December 18, 2007

  • “A Christmas Carol” Retold…

    Black clouds of billowy smoke ascended from factories as cars filled with last-minute shoppers packed the city streets. Meanwhile strategically scattered beggars braved the afternoon cold in order to secure respectable amounts of cash. But Mitch McConnell was not fooled. “That beggar there holding the ‘I am blind’ sign was a customer at my office less than two weeks ago,” he thought to himself. ”And his eyesight seemed just fine then.” A torn up newspaper blew into Mitch’s feet and he tossed it into the trash. “Somebody’s got to clean up the litter in this town,” he muttered. 

    Rob Norman was sitting with his family in front of his tv on a couch, sifting through his son’s medical bills and wondering how he would provide for his family again this Christmas. “I wish Mitch would give me a raise,” he sighed to his wife. “I know I haven’t been there much more than a year, but I think I’ve proven myself.” Truth be told, Rob was thankful that he was hired as an office clerk for Mitch’s investment agency. It was a job and would normally suffice, but with his son’s medical expenses, bills were adding up. And so a worried look accompanied his face on this cold winter afternoon. ”It will be alright,” his son Jim said, looking up to his dad. Rob smiled and rubbed his son’s head. ”Of course it will,” he said, forcing a smile. 

    The next day on his way to work, Mitch was approached by a beggar. “Can I bother you for some change?” he politely asked. Mitch was feeling generous and decided that he would give the man a dollar or two. Yet as he was taking out his wallet he slipped on a patch of ice and fell to the ground. When he was finally able to stand up he realized the man and his wallet were missing. ”Ah, I should have known better!” he yelled, kicking the snow in front of him. 

    Meanwhile, Rob had noticed that Mitch was late for work and decided to turn up the thermostat. As he was adjusting the temperature he heard the door open. ”Wait!” Mitch yelled from the doorway. “Keep it where it was.  We need to save money and stop burning so many damned fossil fuels.” Rob reluctantly turned the heat back down and wandered back to his desk. 

    As the day progressed, Rob was trying to figure out how to talk with Mitch about a salary increase. Yet Mitch was in an unusually angry mood - partly because an important client had canceled his orders to go with a larger company. ”People these days are always pinching pennies,” scowled Mitch, briefly looking up from his computer screen. ”Tell me about it,” responded Rob from his desk, rolling his eyes. Rob was growing tired of Mitch’s increasing inability to see the pennies he himself was pinching. 

    After several hours, Rob finally worked up the courage to go talk with Mitch and walked toward his office. He knocked and Mitch motioned to come in. ”Keep it quick,” he snapped. ”Sir, I would like to talk with you about a possible wage increase. You see, my son Jim is very sick and his medical bills are piling up…”  “Bah…” responded Mitch. ”You saw what happened today. We lost an important client and you’re asking me for a raise? I’m sorry but you’re going to have to wait till next year.” Rob’s eyes saddened and he nodded his head, making his way out of Mitch’s office. “Listen,” said Mitch. “If we weren’t in the red, it would be a different story. But there are sick and hurting people all around and I can’t save the world. I’m sorry but come back and ask me next year.” 

    On his way home from work that day, Mitch decided to take a different route. It just so happened that he passed by Rob’s small apartment and briefly watched him and his family eat dinner by the window. He noticed that Rob appeared worried. Suddenly Rob began to cry and his wife put her arms around him. From where he was standing in the street, Mitch could vividly see the look of sadness on Rob’s face. 

    The next day as Rob was hanging his coat up by the entrance, Mitch called him into his office. Rob walked in with a slightly worried look on his face. “Have a seat,” Mitch said. Rob sat down in a padded leather chair and nervously awaited Mitch’s words. ”Rob I have been looking over our accounts and have found that our profits have significantly decreased this quarter,” he said. Rob nervously responded, fearing that his own job was in jeopardy. ”Sir, if it’s about that wage increase I asked for yesterday, there’s really no need…” Mitch cut him off, “Yes Rob, I’m afraid this is about the wage increase, and I’m afraid I’m going to have to give it to you.” After saying this, Mitch smiled a bit. ”You see, this quarter’s earnings may have been down, but last quarter was our best yet, so I’m sure we’ll be able to survive.” Rob jumped from his seat and shook Mitch’s hand. “Thank you sir!”  Mitch responded, “It’s my pleasure Rob. Now go turn that heat up a bit, it’s cold in here.” 

Comments (7)

  • have a wonderful holiday season :)

  • this is good…

    wish our employer could see the parallel.

  • beautiful st0ry… but i still d0nt like mitch, even after he “redeemed” himself. ha.

  • uh, Mitch McConnell is the Senate Minority leader. seriously. the top ranking republican in the Senate.

  • Derek, Thanks for the comment.  I’ve never been a huge Mitch McConnell fan anyways so making him Scrooge was probably subconscious.  Ah well.  I actually randomly chose the names from 2 of my favorite folk singers (Mitch McVicker and Sean McConnell). 

    Freeeverse, thanks much!  I still don’t like Mitch much either.  I tried spinning this story a bit differently.  :)  

  • RYC: Haha. Pedr0, y0ur c0mment is as if I’m like a rand0m c0mmenter 0n y0ur site I’m subscribed t0 ya, btw! Haha.

  • But I love my gay Anderson Cooper

Post a Comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *